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Aug 16, 2022
Score: a big, fat, juicy, one out of ten.
This anime is extremely slow, like, grandma counting her dimes at the cash levels of slow. I also have a hard time even imagining that more than 1 in every 7 billion people have a crystal fetish, but here we are. I would only recommend this to someone who has already watched Sleeping With Hinako and wants a new terrible OVA to fall asleep to.
The not-so-beautiful bØys in this anime are just that, not beautiful. When you watch a yaoi, you want to see the handsome, succulent bØys in action, but they look like trash. The art
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is middle schoolers deviant art OC levels of ugly. Why are bØys faces so ugly? Why is everything so blurry? Why is there weird effects everywhere? Nobody knows. The two bØys in this OVA are the typical greasy old man and the shy, annoying (and under-aged) bØy that is the staple of every fucking yaoi in existence, because fuck making new characters, this is yaoi and we all want to see the same plot and characters in every single one of these abominations. It should also be noted that the """animation""" is terrible and makes me wish I was watching an unfinished student film project.
Now, besides the looks of the bØys, how do they fare in the soul department? We yaoi connoisseurs are not savages and realise that what's on the inside is what truly counts (LOL). The grizzly teacher man, also known as Onii-chan Sensei, is the rapist in this story. If you seen any yaoi before you know who the rapist is. But this yaoi is not like any other yaoi, because Onii-chan Sensei has a sad backstory where the women he liked dumped him ;O; . Now he's depressed and tells his students to kill themselves because he doesn't want them to be hurt by trusting another human being, so noble! He also has a crystal fetish because crystals won't betray them like the evil women ;O; . And the beautiful bØy who he comes to love turns into crystals for some reason! 100/10 character; lovable, relatable, and true!
For every scruffy yaoi man there is also the smooth, baby-faced bØy who gets groomed by him. In this story the MC spends about 100% of the runtime having self-deprecating monologues about how he has no friends and wants to die, which he hammers into everyones skulls about 90 times every scene. These scenes are extremely boring to watch and made me start thinking about how I wished he fully crystallized and died already. Every scene consists of him being depressing, getting some crystally bits on him, then the crystal disease going away for some reason and the scene ends. Repeat a lot. The end. I do not know why they decided to make this show about him turning into a crystal when being stressed, it just exists, and it's random.
Every yaoi needs to fufill their checklist of taboo and creepy requirements before they can be sent out to the public. I think in the lore of this they forgot to make it an incest story, so they fixed this by making the other bØy call him Onii-chan, which is weird. The teacher also says he'll wait for the bØy to grow up before getting into a relationship with him, which I thought was odd for a yaoi. Typically the younger the bØy is the more the scruffy pedo can't hold in his animal urges anymore and feasts upon them. The teacher is still a major douchebag though and I think there's a real solid reason for why he was dumped, I wonder what horribly toxic and terrible future our bØy has in store for him.
Normally I'd never recommend this dull and uninspired heap of animated garbage to anyone. But yaoi watchers have zero standards, so the worse something is the more they crave it. And I imagine only a yaoi hugger would ever come across this series, so I would 100% recommend this!
Reviewer’s Rating: 1
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Mar 26, 2022
This was one of the worst shows I have ever had the displeasure of watching, there is absolutely nothing redeemable about this sorry excuse of a show. I'd rather rewatch vampire holmes than think about this shit. There wasn't a single brain cell that went into making a creative or new show when this was being made. The entire show is stolen from the hundreds of other generic and bland moe shows out there and it really shows. Every character is a cliche, the artstyle and character designs are the same uninspired shit we've all seen 50 times over and even the writing alone should
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have somebody filing a lawsuit for blatant plagiarism.
This show is remarkably unremarkable in every single way, it doesn't excel at a single thing (not that it tried to do anything in the first place). It's hard to even think of anything to talk about in relation to this show because there is honestly nothing to talk about. If you've seen enough slice of life/comedy anime you can probably guess the entire personality and jokes centered around each character from the poster alone, a quick read of the synopsis and you can probably figure out all the jokes and story bits too. It's insulting how uninspired this dreck is. This show is the perfect example of why so many anime are bad, they don't try, they just copy paste the same things that every other one before it has done so you can literally say you watched everything a show has to offer before watching a single frame of the damn thing.
The ONLY notable things I can say about this rubbish is that irodorimidori is fun to say and that the end cards were nice looking, which is two more compliments than I can give the Pupa anime so I guess it has that going for it. Do not watch this show, even as a joke it's not worth it, it's just boring.
Reviewer’s Rating: 1
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Dec 10, 2021
What a dreadful excuse of a manga this one was. I know that 99/100 horror anthology manga are bad and all but why do they all have to be THIS horrendously awful?
There are 18 stories told over the course of two volumes in this manga, you'd expect at least a couple would be okay, but no, they're all pretty terrible. The only story I thought was mildly entertaining was a joke one that was 4 pages long, the rest were mind numbingly stupid and pointless. The stories all have simple premises but they're all done more or less the same way and very rarely does
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anything exciting or unexpected ever happen in them.
The general theme of each story is that they all have to do with death and or the afterlife. Though sometimes the stories have absolutely no correlation with the theme the manga is supposed to have and they just have random crap happen because why not. The general gist of every story is that a random joe comes across a supernatural thinger-ma-jig and then they either escape, die, or absolutely nothing happens and the chapter ends. Too often it's the latter which is boring and meaningless.
All the individual stories in this manga range from a noble 4 pages to a frightening 80 pages, where the most frightening thing is how much time you waste while reading this manga. All the stories are dull, which makes the longer ones all the more tedious to read through when very little happens over the course of any chapter.
This manga also has some nasty shit in it, like in one story a priests' life purpose is to jack off cats and a robber drinks a jug of the cat semen the priest was saving and is granted immortality, this man is then raped by a giant cat and then beheaded but he still lives as he is immortal. The moral of this story is immortality is bad as it's just eternal suffering. Now please tell me why this story had to involve jerking off cats and a cat raping someone? I think it was supposed to be comedic, but it was more revolting than funny.
When this manga isn't trying to teach you life lessons with it's very unimaginative ghost stories they try and have a few laughs to lighten the mood! It's all dark comedy but just like the stories, the jokes are also excruciating. The comedy and drama elements in this manga don't exactly blend well very much. The jokes are mainly just laughing as misfortunate people, I'm all for some morbid humor, but I don't exactly find some poor sap getting raped very amusing.
The character designs in this manga are fine enough, they're all supposed to be demented looking which sometimes looks nice along with the more realistic backgrounds and background characters. This is the only thing I can find that I'd honestly praise about this manga. With that said though, a lot of the time the characters have pretty much the exact same design as one from a previous story which is lazy. With the unique artstyle I can't imagine they couldn't think of more than one dorky male adult design.
Also, the only reason this manga is called "3, Street of Mysteries" is because in the first story in the anthology, the main character lived in house three on the street of mysteries. It had absolutely nothing to do with the story and the one time it's mentioned, a cab driver makes a bad joke about it and then they move on. I just thought that was an interesting factoid.
In a months time I will probably have forgotten every single story in this anthology, none of them stick with you and they're all extremely uninteresting. I wouldn't recommend this manga to anybody.
Reviewer’s Rating: 2
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Dec 5, 2021
Le Chevalier d'Eon I only decided to read because it had a French name and I didn't want to suffer through another horrendous isekai manga.
One of the few things I could muster the energy to praise about this manga is the story, it was decent. It had some nice twists and turns that made it enjoyable to read. The gimmick of this goon of the week style manga is that they use poetry to fight, yes, poetry. It's essentially a generic action manga with swords, magic and monsters but all of the special moves are related to poetry and the characters, naturally, speak in poetry.
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It's like being in English class listening to the teacher explain the meaning behind all the obtuse Shakespeare lines all over again! Ah memories.
In this tale of woe (and poetry), the main character is a man working for the secret police that when an evil poet starts leveling up their evil poetry, he crossdresses as his sister and gets possessed by her and she starts hackin and slashin the evil poets for revenge as she was killed by a poet and wants revenge. Which is a story that exists now. The sister that possesses the main character is also nicknamed "Sphinx" because she asks a lot of questions and kills you when you don't know the answer, even if the questions are always about herself so all the villains are naturally, always confused as heck. There is an entire mystery surrounding Sphinx but they never really give you a reason to care about this character, they're by far the most boring and uninteresting character in the entire manga.
The fights themselves are okay, the villains are typically pretty cool looking and are just cool psychopaths where every single one of them speaks in rhymes, which is awesome. The fights actually have nice developments that use the current villains magic gimmick in fun and interesting ways. The main problem with the fights is that the way the overpowered main character defeats the enemies is usually lame and anti-climatic since it's entirely done with word-play using french and latin poetry.. Which is unique.. It just doesn't make for a good fight as most of the time you have to just accept what's happening as you don't have a vast knowledge on 18th century france, latin, or random mythology.
Since Sphinx is the pseudo main character, obviously, they have infinite knowledge and their skills in poetry is unmatched. The Sphinx starts as a measly level 3 poet in the patented evil poetry society leveling up chart (which is actually a thing that exists) but since they need a reason to somehow beat the stronger poets, they level up for no fucking reason and everyone is confused. I don't even think Sphinx themselves knows why, it is also unknown why Sphinx is even on the evil poets society leveling up chart to begin with, they just are. For the record, the evil poet leveling up chart I believe goes up to level 8 and the entire purpose of the secret police is to stop the evil poets from reaching this level and destroying france and the catholic church by maxing out their evilness the poet level, this manga takes itself 100% serious.
The instant you start this manga your eyes will actually be blasted with some of the ugliest art you've seen in manga. The character designs are hideous and so complex that sometimes it's hard to tell what you're looking at. I would feel bad for the artist that they had to draw these horrendously ugly looking characters, that is, if they actually tried the entire time. The artist sometimes just says fuck it and just draws the most lazy and incoherent crap I've seen in a manga. The proportions of the characters never made sense but sometimes it's honestly so embarrassing that I'm honestly surprised that the publishers allowed them to release some of those drawings to the public.
The absolute worst part of this manga is the ending or lack thereof. Just like the artist who couldn't give a single shit about this manga, neither did the publishers I guess, because during the final volume you could tell the exact point where they axed the manga and absolutely nothing is concluded! What a colossal waste of time that was, 8 volumes and absolutely nothing is concluded. No story elements are finished, no mysteries solved, some of the villains are still left undefeated. Just nothing. All we get is "tHe StOrY cOnTiNuEs!11" which is the most non-ending one can come up with. Fuck this manga.
All I got from this manga is a reminder to why I stopped liking manga and a deep feeling of sorrow as I realise how many hours of my life were wasted reading something that I'll never get to see the conclusion of. Even before the final volume, the manga was never that good to begin with but the non-existent ending really doesn't make this one worth reading very much.
Reviewer’s Rating: 3
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